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Tuesday, May 11, 2010

The Intolerable

I over look the Valley, It has become so familiar to me and I know not what is to be done.

I hear your beguiling sneers, your words of death, to kill me, to rent me as cloth.

I cry in my quite places

To never be brought to light

I see a distant light

Fading or growing

The darkness comes over me

I see no light

Only pain

The comfort of that which I know

The betrayal of that which has always been there

To slay it

To stay it

From killing my soul

Light again

Only to reveal my tears, my pain?

Oh Lord where is your power?

Where is my conviction?

I need not of darkness

Be it banished

Yet not is this to be?

Darkness and pain

The words come back and rip into my heart……………..YOU ARE NOT AS WE

So you distance that which is different,



I do not threaten you?? Do I?

I see what cannot be seen.

Know what cannot be known.

I am what cannot be; yet here I stand.

Accused, abused, confused, and diffused.

I understand, which is my crime,

But in understanding am I confused as to why.

They are coming

They want to destroy all that is me


I wish to know not

To see not

To be not

My prayers fall to the ground as empty

They are here

Lord save me

They thrust their accusations into me, piercing me

Blood flows from my wounds

They look upon me as the deserving of my fate

More accusation and I am pierced again and again




I want to feel.

To live

To be among the living, the normal, the accusers

Am I one of they?

Et to?

My soul grows cold

The words have done what is to be done

Darkness comes over me, cold, dieing, HELP.

I know again, in this dieing time, that my weakness is caring

Feeling what should be left unfelt

Helping what should be unhelped

In this time, I chose to die

Die a death of pain and murder at the hands of all I care for and of

Die a death of feeling and knowing.

Rather than live a life of ignorance and cold.

So I look into the eyes of my accusers, my murderers and shed my last tear

For they

My last breath saying it is OK

Et to?

The valley, the valley, my blood spills into the valley, into the darkness once again.

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